Eliminating Mental Clutter...The Key To Better
Productivity AND Peace Of Mind
Copyright 2005 Kerry Flinders
I am a very busy gal. I have a successful marriage. I have
two active young teen age boys. I run a successful business
(both on and off of the internet). My home is always
presentable. My laundry is always done. And I strive to
live a stress free life as well.
I have been called a “super woman” by my friends. They do
not understand how I can accomplish so much, and yet always
seem to be so relaxed and happy. They want to know my
secrets.
My secrets?? I have but one…and it really is as simple as
eliminating my "mental clutter".
”Mental Clutter”? What is that? How do you eliminate it?
Here’s how I manage to accomplish my goals, keep my family
happy AND maintain a happy stress free attitude:
1. I use lists...lists...lists...lists. I can NOT function
at any capacity without my lists. I have a list of LONG
term goals (when I want to retire, how I expect to get
there, etc). I have a list of MEDIUM term goals (what room
I want to paint in the future, what I want to teach my kids
before they move out etc). I also have a Weekly list and a
Daily list.
Yes, lists take time, but after I took the time to make the
longer lists then it really is no work at all to sit at my
desk in the morning and jot down the things I need to do
today and this week.
Having lists keeps this "stuff" out of my head. If I ever
wonder what I need to be doing it's written down somewhere
for me to look at. I never have to think about what is next
to do...ever.
2. Remember that Stress is a State of Mind. It isn't real.
We make it up. I know people with 10 times my work load who
are way less stressed than me. I also know people with
hardly anything to do each day but seem to be about to pop
a blood vessel.
I just remember that when I am feeling stressed I'm doing
it to myself; no one is forcing me to feel stressed.
Nothing can make you feel stressed but yourself.
So, simply, I just refuse to feel stressed in my head. I do
not mull over my lists, or my obligations, or the dirty
dishes, or anything.
3. Learn to say NO. This was one of the things that took me
the longest to learn, yet has given me the best release of
mental clutter.
I say no to family get-togethers if they seem more of a
hassle than fun. I say no to church obligations that I
really do not have time for. I say no to my kid’s schools
when they ask for help I do not have time to give.
When you are always saying yes it is more than just filling
up your schedule with other peoples needs. You are also
filling up your mind with all the things that go with the
project, as well as all the mental "self talk" you have
about the project...for example, "Why did I say yes?? I
don't have time for this. When am I going to get this
done?” etc etc etc.
So, be brave and learn to say no. It's that simple. And it
really helps clear a lot of mental clutter.
4. Self Talk. Since we've mentioned self talk above lets
discuss it further. If you are like I used to be (OK, how I
really am, but control now) you have conversations going on
in your head with yourself ALL DAY long. You might even
wake up in the middle of the night talking to yourself
inside your head.
Shush yourself right now. You need to learn to quiet your
mind. If you have all your obligations written down on
lists then there really isn't any need to self talk.
I had to take some meditation classes to quiet my self
talk. It still tries to pipe up every day, but I have the
meditation skills to quiet it quickly now.
This eliminates tons of mental clutter. If you find that
you MUST talk to yourself inside your head, then whenever
you find yourself doing so, choose ONE sentence, one
positive, powerful sentence to say over and over and over.
A lot of times the sentence I choose is this: "I am calm
and happy."
5. Put things into perspective/stop worrying. Many times
your brain is busy working on many different things it
doesn't need to be working on.
Having lists will free up a lot of time in your mind. What
about the things you just can't get out of your head?
Business worries (I have these all the time). Children
worries. etc. Put them in perspective.
How important are they...really? You're worried about what
will happen to your kids if you died...so write a will, set
up power of attorney, pick out your replacements, know
you've done everything you can to prepare for it, then
refuse to think about it any longer.
If you were to die tomorrow...I use this idea a lot. If you
were to die tomorrow, then what things in your head, that
are driving you nuts right now, would really matter?
I just read today about a study that measured what percent
of our worrying was really important. After the huge
percentage of worrying about things we cannot change,
things that will never happen, things we have no power
over...the astonishing small amount of things we worry
over, that really should be worried over is...8%.
So if you are having a lot of mental clutter due to worry,
put everything into perspective and realize you should only
worry over about 8% of the stuff you are currently worrying
over.
6. Be like the child. Ever watch a 3 year old play? Not
much on their mind. Just what is at hand. They don't
remember the mess in their room at home (You do). They
don't think about what they will be eating for dinner (You
are). They don't even worry about the fight they got into
yesterday with their best friend (You would). They just
focus on the task at hand, happy to do so.
Practice this "way" children have. Practicing letting your
thoughts go...focusing only on what is before you.
7. Yoga. Ok, a lot of people do NOT want to hear this, but
yoga is WONDERFUL on so many levels...especially helping
you to eliminate mental clutter. One of the practices that
makes yoga yoga is the fact that it teaches you over time
to stop thinking about anything but the yoga pose you are
in. Over time you become VERY good at this. It helps in all
areas of my life to focus and eliminate mental clutter.
I actually highly recommend a regular yoga practice, even
if it's only in the comfort of your own home with some
video tapes. Eliminating mental clutter is just ONE of the
great benefits I get from yoga...but such an important one.
So, those are my thoughts on mental clutter and what to do
with it. I don't like it, I don't allow it to be in my
head, and I actually actively work to eliminate it whenever
it rears its ugly head.
Having this philosophy, and working towards keeping mental
clutter out helps me to be very stress free. It is very
liberating and it also helps me to be a happier mother,
wife and person in general.
Achieving an uncluttered mind helps me to do better with my
business and to be better with my patience as well.
Mull over the ideas here. Maybe read a book or two on the
topic as well. You should strive to learn to control your
own mind. Don't let it just wonder around willy nilly (I
love that expression). Learn to control it, clean it out,
like a room, dust it out...keep it tidy and bright.
You will feel so much better when you can do this.
Just remember, this takes time. For me, the transition from
stressed out woman to stress free woman took me a year and
a half.
But it was so worth it. I promise.
The author Kerry Flinders is the owner of Personal
Organizing Solutions located in Southern California. Kerry
and her company are dedicated to helping others organize
their clutter and their lives, eliminating unnecessary
stress and helping the client to find more time in their
day for the things they love. Kerry is the author of the
book “Organizing With NO Budget”. You can find out more
about Kerry and Personal Organizing Solutions by visiting
their website at
http://personalorganizingsolutions.com
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