Building Your Self Esteem and Confidence
Copyright 2003, Julie Plenty
When it comes to building self esteem and confidence, don't
think self improvement, think self development. What's the
difference? If you regard personal development as
improvement, it suggests that something in you needs to be
Each improvement then leads to the need for more
improvements and you'll be stuck in a cyclical loop of
personal improvements that never seem good enough.
So start with your existing strengths, skills, talents and
gifts and develop these from a position of strength.
Building self esteem and confidence is a process that
involves making changes. Making changes takes time and
energy. So one of the best ways to raise your self esteem
is to improve your level of energy and dynamism.
Improving your Energy and Dynamism
To achieve this, ensure that you have a nourishing diet,
sleep well, take regular exercise, meditate regularly, make
time to do things that you enjoy spend time with people you
love. More importantly, develop a structure and routine so
that these aspects are built into your daily life. For
example schedule time during the day to relax, meditate,
take a walk etc.
Building self esteem and confidence is dependent on breaking
old habits and developing new productive ones. A key habit
that needs to be shattered is the habit of negative
thinking. These thoughts are so interwoven into the fabric
of your mind that you assume that they are normal and
changeable - but they are not! Learning how to acknowledge
and deal with your inner critic is an extremely effective
way of starting to boost your self esteem.
Forget the Blame Game!
Stop judging yourself and other people in your life for what
has happened to you in the past. Playing the Blame Game
serves no one, least of all yourself. People did what they
thought was best at the time, the same way you did. Learn
to forgive yourself and others for past mistakes.
Harbouring old grudges takes up a lot of time and energy you
could be using in more productive ways.
Learn how to reconcile, resolve and accept what has happened
in the past and know that it has made you a much stronger
person. Acknowledge your fears and find out what's really
behind them. Many of your fears are likely to be
groundless, but it is the thinking, attitudes and beliefs
that cause much of the inappropriate fear. Fear is often a
disguise for your lack of belief in yourself and your
Best way to start building self esteem and confidence
The best way to start building your self esteem and
confidence is to commit to making changes. Even if you use
just one of the examples listed above, it will begin to make
a difference to your level of self esteem. Know that you
are valued, regardless of what has happened before.
Julie Plenty is a Personal and Business Coach who has
developed techniques to build her own self esteem and confidence
and now helps others do the same. Join her newsletter "Only
Connect" and you are offered a free ecourse "5 ways to not
improve your self esteem!". You can subscribe by visiting her website:
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